Many years ago I made the decision to literally dwell in the cesspool of anger – anger towards myself for my sinful choice of abortion and anger towards those who I perceived to be the root of my problems. Crushing ocean depths of pain imploded me, while on the surface a hurricane of rage lashed out at others. I daily soaked in my brokenness of heart until every thought, word, and deed became saturated in the brine of bitterness. Tainted heart-water nourished a twisted weed that pushed its long roots deep into my soul and corrupted my entire life. My once bottled-up anger now escaped like pressure-cooker steam from every pore of my being. It eroded my personal relationships both inside and outside my family. I became obsessed to the point of being emotionally crippled, resentful, and depressed. I existed as the polar opposite to what Jesus was on the cross.
The Bible doesn’t teach us not to feel angry; rather it teaches us how to handle it. At such times, it helps to remember that the Spirit’s work in us is a process; that we must repeatedly turn from persistent attitudes and reactions that constantly rear their heads. If we dwell on the things that feed our anger, we give the devil a place to tread and eventually rest. Instead, we must continually turn over to God our biting sarcasm, quarreling, spite, and inclination to injure others.
God’s grace has the power to set us free from bondage to our internal turmoil and excess baggage that weighs us down. His grace enables us to walk freely in His forgiveness and everlasting love despite the emotional turmoil. We do not have to live in slavery to it.
While my sinful actions resulted in some unwanted consequences, my decision to repent and turn to the Father for abundant grace and mercy through the precious blood of Jesus has resulted in overflowing blessing that has allowed me to be healed and set free to walk in victory.